Author: Chauntel Ensey

I love this quilt! Big enough to wrap up and cuddle under, from head to toe and a bit extra, but not too heavy that I have to leave it behind when I move around the house from room to room.
It is satin on one side, the platinum side obviously, and fleece on the other, chartreuse or puke green as Mom calls it, with a warm and natural batting, and a dark brown binding.
I am demanding and asked for an original quilted design, I didn’t want it like any others she has done.
I love it, feminine but spiky, kinda like me.

So here is a project, From Russia with Love, that I NEED to make…and pronto!! I find that shoveling snow in the wind at midnight with a windchill of well below zero kind of sucks.
I will make the face opening a bit smaller, knit it with a tad heavier yarn to match gauge resulting in a tighter fabric, not sure of a color yet. I am thinking cream, nice and versatile and easy to see my head at night poking out of my long black down coat. Although dark gray is really what I want. So maybe both. I could use both, one at home and one at work.
The Rain Drops Dress will only be put on hold until a few necessities are knit, or crocheted, we’ll talk about that in a second.
 

I had to start a new hat for Trevor last night. He has grown so much since last winter that he has NO hats that fit him!! And he spends hours outside playing every single day. I am just doing a simple Single Crochet Beanie with earflaps for him. Covering their ears is so important here with the wind.
I will most likely have to make him another the second I am done just so he has one at hand at all times. And another simple balaclava like the one he already has.

Why don’t pictures ever do it justice??
I shoveled around the entire exterior of the hotel, took me about 40 minutes. By my calculations I burned 170 calories based on my height, weight and age through this website, Fitday.com
But, by the time I was back to where I started there was a new inch. Never ending. But I don’t mind so much, it’s physical.

Edited to add:
I will be back here at 7:30am for a shift tomorrow and will have the pleasure of shoveling again, I am sure. So, I figure it saves me more work to shovel tonight in preparation for tomorrow ;o) Smart lady, thinkin’ ahead.
And another thing, umm…you should switch the snow shovel to you other hand so you get a nice, well rounded, ambidextrous workout. Use all sides, keep your abs tight :o) Love this shit.

I turn 36 later this week and while we are ignoring that wholly, I did decide to treat myself to a gym membership with personal training (if we can get my insurance to cover it under the treatment for my anorexia, possible but not terribly likely). Why personal training? I don’t need to tips, guidance with equipment or the how to’s, I need to be held accountable that I am actually putting on the muscle and weight and not working any more off.
My doctor is working with me too, soon I do believe there will be a nutritionist involved but we’ll see about that. Not sure about losing all control yet.
And my dear little brother, Scott, who is a certified trainer (many, many certifications) runs and owns his own gym, Crossfit Parabellum. He is riding me, keeping me honest, and now has contact with Amber, my personal trainer here. He is a wealth of information about me that I may not openly tell her but she needs to know. Dammit.
So, I will be sore tomorrow. And I will have a week before my next training session to workout how I like while being careful not to break any of my “rules” that have been set for me. No cardio at all. No ab work. No workouts longer than 30 minutes. Did I mention the no cardio part? I don’t like that at all. I like the high with cardio. But I like the high with lifting too so I guess a substitute is okay.
Here’s a funny for you all…if I move wrong my workout pants will fall down.
When I workout at home I just wear leggings or lounge pants. Neither of those will work with weights and equipment really. Although I suppose I could go in leggings, it’s a bit of a scary sight that I am not sure I want to share with strangers :o) My own sister told me not too long ago it wasn’t okay. And Mom isn’t real happy about seeing me in leggings either. Mom suggested this morning before I left for the gym that I go ahead and wear Dad’s suspenders to keep my pants up. What I think I will get are some lightweight basketball shorts or something with elastic waistbands. I did have a friend that said he would walk around behind me holding my pants up, he isn’t here to help out so I guess I must figure this one out on my own.
Or better yet, I can get some muscles on my ass to hold my pants up!! I like that plan!! Now if there were some quick fix for my lack of a need for a sports bra that would be good too. Chest muscles filling out a bra just aren’t terribly attractive ;o)
Eh, it is what it is.
Anyway, chatty without much real information coming out tonight.
I like the gym, new equipment, it’s very clean ;o) and the staff is nice. We’ll see how well they do with bossing me when I don’t want to be bossed but need to be. I hate that I am at a place where I need monitoring but I put myself in this position, I will have to just deal until I am healthy enough for them all to kiss off. I say that with all love and affection for everybody that is helping me get healthy.
Total side note: I am at work posting and as I sit here and type there are 2 boys (guests of the hotel of course) in the kitchen/dining area using the microwave, loud and obnoxious. Every nerve in me is about to snap and send them to their room! As soon as their food is done cooking I may ask them to go back to their room, if their parents don’t like it then they can come out here with them and monitor them. So there.
Or better yet I should call up one of the trucker’s staying here tonight and have them handle it :oD
I am evil. I admit it.

I need a gray and yellow striped shawl.
I need a gray solid shawl too.
And a gray and yellow striped sweater.
Or better yet a gray cardigan with yellow piping and possibly ruffles somewhere.
Hmm…December and January had better be finishing months to get some of my needles unoccupied for use.

Just an update picture of the back, it is about 12" long. Enjoying the yarn, RYC Cashcotton, and the pattern so far.

Page Content updated

I am pretty excited I started this dress but it’s going to be a seriously long haul of a knit.

He would have turned 36 a few days ago. It has been over 6 years since he passed away and over 7 years since I saw him last.
I think about him a lot in December, both of our birthdays and the holidays. He has a daughter that will never know what a beautiful man he was. Funny, sensitive, strong, so caring. I loved him like a brother and miss him. I don’t think I have ever mentioned him here before. It’s a quiet grief I carry. I never have trouble seeing his face and hearing his voice, his laugh. I love that, it brings me comfort.
Once, when we were about 17, he was at our house in Pollock Pines and we were jumping on the trampoline (yes, we were often ridiculously immature), he decided he could do a front flip. Andy was at least 6’4″ tall. I wondered how he would get all that length tucked and around. He did. He went so high and tight that he went way over the side and landed on his head on the gravel. Knocked him out, I was thanking God I was working on the ambulance going through the medical ROP program so I could do CPR in case he was dying. His eyes popped open and after a second of unbelief we started laughing maniacally. Then we got on our mountain bikes and rode trails for a couple of hours.
We spent more time together on our mountain bikes, in our trucks offroad, at his house listening to music. Even in college I would leave work late at night, drive to his house in old town Sac and stay up most of the night listening to music, laying on his bed talking and laughing.
He was always a protector. He would tell me a boyfriend was cheating, he was right. He would tell me I was being stupid about something, he was right. His gut instincts about me were always spot on. From our sophmore year in high school until I got married he was my rock. I always knew he was where I could go.
Maybe that is why now I miss him so often.
He did the music at our wedding. He wanted me to walk down the aisle to Punk Rock Girl but my husband didn’t think that was a good idea, I shrugged it off and went traditional.
I didn’t spend much time with him that day and after I was married it was hard to have a man as a best friend when I had a partner, another half. We drifted apart. We would talk on the phone every so often but it wasn’t the same.
About a year and a half before he died, we were living in Placerville and he and his wife and baby girl were living in Pollock Pines and we were able to have more contact but not much. Not as much as we both wanted. Spouses came first as well as their wishes. Our spouses weren’t jealous I don’t think. But they weren’t okay with us being friends either. Even as couples it didn’t work out.
That made me more angry than sad, especially after Andy died. He was my friend, I should have had the right to have him in my life. I missed out, my kids missed out on ever getting to know him and his family.
I couldn’t make it to his funeral. His wife Mary called me the day after he died, I was on my way to knitting when we did a once a month Meetup group at Muddy Waters (old school SBKnitters will know what I am talking about, I do believe it was the night the guy had the GodBox there performing, whatever).
I had time to get to Placerville for the funeral but there were circumstances that kept me from going. I am angry over that too but wonder if there was some other reason I wasn’t supposed to go. I remember what I was wearing, where I was at in my car (before the no cell phone while driving law). It was a horrible moment that I pretty much immediately internalized. I told George, I told Tracy. Noone else. We never really had mutual friends, he had his and I had mine without them ever overlapping really. Seems odd now but it worked well for us.
I didn’t keep in touch with his wife and daughter or his dad after the first set of holidays. I feel bad about that, I think of them often.
I miss Andrew. I feel he’s always been at peace. He was an amazing man that I love still. Friends like Andy only come along once in a lifetime, I was blessed to have had him.
Now I will go laugh, cry and listen to Nine Inch Nails.

P. S. Someday I will tell you about trying to make me a fake ID so I could go to a show that was 21 one over. Funniest fuckin’ night ever…. well maybe just to us…