Something I find interesting… alone at night

For a lot of years, I mean a lot, I avoided music. I didn’t lose interest, I avoided it purposefully.
I get sucked in, addicted, I fall in love with it. Maybe I was too immersed in it at a young age when my brain was like a sponge, forming permanent connections.
I fell asleep with music from before I can remember until I got married. Unfortunately my tastes for music to fall asleep to and my husbands taste were nowhere close. So I dropped it.
If I wanted to go to a show the first couple years it was never what my husband liked so I didn’t go. Eventually I dropped music since it was a point of contention. I found a few bands we could compromise on but again, I immersed myself in them. Going to every show within 2 hours of us, buying every version of every album, knowing their full history and sadly even a few birthdays lol
Yah, no surprise my obsession was noticed and wasn’t loved. So for the last 4 years until this last spring I avoided music again. Spring came, changes were made, I got to choose my passions once again. Understand I was never really told I couldn’t have my music, my shows. It was an unsaid understanding. Not worth the arguments. No, I didn’t want to run off with the first punk boy I met at a show. Gosh! (Channeled Napoleon Dynamite for a second, sorry)
Tracy has witnessed my obsession first hand and can attest to my love for shows. She may actually think I go a bit insane 🙂 Very unlike me. But actually it is more the true me than I have shown for the majority of the last 17 years or so.
Good God getting older sucks. I realize that I am not old yet, I just can’t help feeling I missed some good years.
All this because I came into bed 4 hours ago, put my headphones on and was instantly wired.
There are a few things I am going to have more of; concerts, loud music dancing around the house with my kids, streetbikes (don’t laugh, after I gain weight and I am kick ass strong again I am going to learn to ride without a man to hold onto. Mmmm…. I love riding behind a man though). My brother got a new bike and I was instantly jealous.
Frick, now I am really awake.
Oh well, more personal crap that could have all stayed in my head except that I know it’s loved by all that stop by 😉
oh! I broke a filling/tooth while camping. Damn s’mores. Payback for eating shit I shouldn’t eat. More bills, yay. Sure wish that full time job with benefits would hurry up and call… there are prospects!

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